apparently, according to one of my friends, am not allowed to write off a person completely just because they are going out with someone who reflects badly on them.
i can't decide if this is a good thing or a bad thing. that i'm not allowed to write them off, i mean. it would probably simpler to write them off, really, just forget about them and never consider them again. and yet, it does seem a pity.
still, i can't help but be disappointed to see someone i thought had potential turn out to be going out with someone whom, well... let's just say that if i heard that this person was going with someone, i would immediately have a negative impression of the person who they were going out with, because in general, the kind of person who would want to go out with someone like that is not the kind of person i'd usually want to interact with. i mean, what does that say about someone, that they'd go out with someone like that?
i know, i'm having serious pronoun Issues. but *i* know what i mean, and i think you should be able to figure it out, too, from context. so there.
i am sad that i did not go to manray today. i've been wanting to go, because this guy from a dance class i took recently mentioned that he goes sometimes and it would be cool to run into him, and besides i like dancing and i like manray. and then a friend of mine from out of town is in town for part of this week, including tonight, and proposed a manray trip. and i said i wanted to come. i even wore my Morticia-like outfit of long straight skirt and sweater with bell sleeves and sweetheart neckline. but, alas, i'm in the midst of fighting off a cold, and it became clear that staying out late dancing would be a really bad idea for me tonight. :( so sad. but probably for the best. anyway, i should be seeing the friend from out of town twice while he's here, so that's okay. and there will be other opportunities to go to manray and run into the guy. i could even email him, if i get sufficiently brave. so that's okay too.
yesterday i got a package from a friend of mine from high school of whom i am extremely fond. the package included a C.S. Lewis book retelling the Cupid-Psyche myth and some lovely stationary, and the news that she had given my address to a mutual friend/acquaintance who i've sort of lost contact with in past years -- and who i've always wanted to be better friends with. i really really hope he writes me. really really really.
i have been so bad on the food front this week. i seem to have just let myself go, it's terrible. over the weekend, you know, i was out of town (at the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire, whee!), yadda yadda. but today, today there was just no excuse! and it wasn't even so much that i was hungry, or that i really desired specific foods that i then savored. oh no, today was the pure and simple devouring of food, practically bolting it in a quest for excessive sustenance. it might be because of the whole being sick thing, my body really wants more food to help fuel its battle with the illness. but man. not good. i hope i can reassert willpower tomorrow.
speaking of asserting willpower, while at the PA RenFaire, i discovered that i have at least a small amount of potential to become a cradle-robber. one is really not allowed to find the younger sibling of someone already 3 years younger than one attractive, especially if the someone is still an undergraduate in college. it's not the physical years necessarily, it's the psychological meaning of the years. nevermind that i'm not actually sure how *much* younger the sibling is... i'm scared that it's so much younger that the sibling is still in high school... now that would be disturbing. anyway, i think i will make a bit of an effort not to cradle-rob. at least, not *too* much. the idea of dating someone younger does interest me, though, just cause at this point i'm used to dating someone older... variety is good...
i did manage to control my spending tendencies mildly well while at RenFaire, making only two purchases besides food -- one cloak clasp, which i really needed, and one surprisingly delicate poison ring. i am rather proud of my control. i am trying to get the whole money situation under control. on Friday, i plan to cancel 3 credit cards. this is a wonderful thing.
and if i were smart, i would have been in bed hours ago. instead, i am writing this journal entry. well, and instead, i hung out a bit with my housemates, which was certainly nice. but anyway, sleep now.